This is a topic that is very hard to have to deal with for me, as I got married the first time when I was only 17. Heck, back in my time, it was ok to do that, plus, I was raised with the notion that you got married to be a housewife and there were very little divorces. Wow... times have really changed. I raised my older 2 girls to be able to stand on their own 2 feet, without a man, if need be and to be able to support themselves however, when I raised them, marriage was still pretty much the way to go. Today is even more liberal. Today's women are much more free.
Here is my advice to my daughter on boys.
1. Don't date until you are ready.
2. Don't let him tell you what to do, push you around or make ugly comments towards you... because that is NOT okay.
3. Don't get serious with a guy who doesn't have a job and a car. Now, I am talking about the ones that are old enough of course, and that especially means that if they don't have the money to take you out, you should not have to pay for all the dates.
4. Don't let a guy make you feel like you should do something because he wants you to do it and if it's uncomfortable to you, then don't.
5. Always follow that gut feeling inside...it's actually telling you something.
6. Don't get involved in a guy who does things you are against because that will always cause a riff.
7. Don't fall for every line. Alot of it is a crock. Young men are not ready to settle down yet.
8. Treat a guy how you would like to be treated. And if you don't get that same treatment back then he's not worth it.
9. Not every boyfriend will work out. You will go through alot of trial and error while dating, which is a good thing, so you can find out what you want for your future.
10. Think long and hard before you go out and have sex or do something that you will regret.
oh man, I think that's it for today. This is a subject that I could probably write a book about. I have made so many mistakes in my past, and Thank goodness, I can still write about it.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Learning how to take care of your things
I am amazed at all the new gadgets and things out there these days for us parents to buy. The computer, laptop, i-pod and cell phones and such. When I was a teenager, I had all the clothes that I wanted, but never did I ask for anything with designer names. We went to the mall yesterday, and while I understand the need for jeans that fit, such as slim sized and length size, that's alright with me, but nowadays, asking for shoes from those special places in the mall, that is something that I never got to do. My older kids did the same, and it drove me nuts. Now, yesterday was the first time that I was asked by my youngest to buy a pair of name brand shoes. I pray that these last, especially with the cost I had to pay, and to have to buy the spray that goes with it to keep it clean.
Here is something that I want you to learn dear daughter.
1. Be Thankful. Always be thankful for the things that you have, for there are more unfortunate kids out there going without. Actually you are very lucky to get some really nice things.2
2. Don't leave your things hanging about here and there. Take the time to pick back up those clothes and put them where they belong if you decide you don't want to wear it after getting it out. Who wants to wash clothes that were already clean but just left on the floor?
3. Washclothing with care. Now some of you get to have your clothes washed for you, but in our personal case, my daughter washes her own clothes, not only so she can help out with chores, but to learn how to take care of her own clothing. Wash things that are delicate, carefully.
Wash new things carefully. Don't let those clothes stay wrinkled in the dryer. Get them hung up quickly so you don't have to get out that dreaded iron.
4. Electronics are a blessing. Laptops, computers, that new i-pod you got for Christmas, and that new cell phone you got a few weeks ago are not to be taken for granted. Remember that these items can break easily if you don't handle with care. Take a few extra moments after you are done using them to make sure that you have closed them down properly or stored them where they belong so that they don't get stepped on and broken.
Here is something that I want you to learn dear daughter.
1. Be Thankful. Always be thankful for the things that you have, for there are more unfortunate kids out there going without. Actually you are very lucky to get some really nice things.2
2. Don't leave your things hanging about here and there. Take the time to pick back up those clothes and put them where they belong if you decide you don't want to wear it after getting it out. Who wants to wash clothes that were already clean but just left on the floor?
3. Washclothing with care. Now some of you get to have your clothes washed for you, but in our personal case, my daughter washes her own clothes, not only so she can help out with chores, but to learn how to take care of her own clothing. Wash things that are delicate, carefully.
Wash new things carefully. Don't let those clothes stay wrinkled in the dryer. Get them hung up quickly so you don't have to get out that dreaded iron.
4. Electronics are a blessing. Laptops, computers, that new i-pod you got for Christmas, and that new cell phone you got a few weeks ago are not to be taken for granted. Remember that these items can break easily if you don't handle with care. Take a few extra moments after you are done using them to make sure that you have closed them down properly or stored them where they belong so that they don't get stepped on and broken.
Friday, February 23, 2007
Raising a teenaged daugther
Boy is it hard these days !!! I have already raised 2 daughters and 2 sons, and I just turned 50 years old last week, and I still have a 13 yr. old daughter at home.
My oldest child is now 31 and will be 32 in June, and most of my children are 5 years apart. Things just aren't the same as they used to be. Especially from times when I was growing up.
My mother raised me on little ditties, nursery ryhmes and alot of little "sayings".
One little saying that she always said was " pretty is as pretty does" basically meaning, that if you want to be pretty towards other people, you must not only be pretty on the outside, but have a "pretty" inside, in your ways of being and in your actions. You must act "pretty" towards others and that will make you a "pretty" person.
That is one thing that I want my teenage daughter to learn. So, here are a couple of things I want to start with.
1. " pretty is, as pretty does" for people look at you from the inside in as well as the outside.
To my lovely daughter, who is learning how to grow in today's society, please hear me when I tell you that your actions really do count and people will remember the kind of attitude you present towards others. Some people, well, they may not care, but the MOST important people will.
2. attitude is everything, and I say that to show you that sometimes things in life, will go your way. But other times, they won't. So, always have the attitude that you can and will do your best to accomplish life's little twists and turns. Life is not easy, but having a good attitude towards things will get you farther.
3. "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" again is one thing that I want my daughter to carry with her as she goes into her daily routine of school. It is so very hard to always have this feeling when others are hurting you, but please learn how to do the best you can with this. You will go far in life treating others how you wish to be treated.
I will be writing more topics as time goes on, because there are so many things I want to tell my child to be able to carry with her in this life, especially being a teenager and facing life's hardships. Of course, there are going to be many wonderful days, but being a teen is challenging to today's teens.
My oldest child is now 31 and will be 32 in June, and most of my children are 5 years apart. Things just aren't the same as they used to be. Especially from times when I was growing up.
My mother raised me on little ditties, nursery ryhmes and alot of little "sayings".
One little saying that she always said was " pretty is as pretty does" basically meaning, that if you want to be pretty towards other people, you must not only be pretty on the outside, but have a "pretty" inside, in your ways of being and in your actions. You must act "pretty" towards others and that will make you a "pretty" person.
That is one thing that I want my teenage daughter to learn. So, here are a couple of things I want to start with.
1. " pretty is, as pretty does" for people look at you from the inside in as well as the outside.
To my lovely daughter, who is learning how to grow in today's society, please hear me when I tell you that your actions really do count and people will remember the kind of attitude you present towards others. Some people, well, they may not care, but the MOST important people will.
2. attitude is everything, and I say that to show you that sometimes things in life, will go your way. But other times, they won't. So, always have the attitude that you can and will do your best to accomplish life's little twists and turns. Life is not easy, but having a good attitude towards things will get you farther.
3. "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" again is one thing that I want my daughter to carry with her as she goes into her daily routine of school. It is so very hard to always have this feeling when others are hurting you, but please learn how to do the best you can with this. You will go far in life treating others how you wish to be treated.
I will be writing more topics as time goes on, because there are so many things I want to tell my child to be able to carry with her in this life, especially being a teenager and facing life's hardships. Of course, there are going to be many wonderful days, but being a teen is challenging to today's teens.
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